Questioning Authority

(warning, stream of consciousness post as I ramble on trying to figure this out myself)

So, N came home from kindergarten on Monday saying that the teacher said ducks are not birds, humans are not apes, and when N said they were, the whole class laughed at her.

I told her ducks are birds, humans are apes, and I'll discuss this with her teacher. Tuesday morning Mrs. O and I made arrangements for me to talk to her this morning.

I wanted to find out what happened from the teacher's perspective, as I couldn't believe Mrs. O would say those things.

Ok, ducks are birds, Mrs. O agrees with me, she said there was a lot of talking going on when she was starting a discussion about animals, that's probably where she heard that. That was my easy lead-in into the ape discussion....

Mrs. O was talking about animals, how insects are animals, fish are animals, even we humans are animals. Much disagreement from the class on that one. She said, oh yes, we're animals, and we're mammals, too! The class in general was in disbelief. It was then that N, being the true daughter of a zoologist that she is, raised her hand and said that we're apes as well.

The class laughed at her. Mrs. O then told her that we are NOT apes, we're humans.

N, being the smart yet sensitive child she is, was totally confused and ended up crying when she told me this story. I don't think she cried in class, though. But it was obvious that this conflict was upsetting her.

Here's the thing. Hubby and I have been telling her we're apes since, heck, I have no idea, probably ever since she started showing an interest in animals. So, like, for the past five years? The fact is, we are apes. Evolution or creation, we are classified in the Linnean taxonomic system as hominids, along with gorillas, chimpanzees, and (for some camps) orangutans. If a creationist can agree that we are mammals, then I don't see how they can't agree we are apes as well. The taxonomy doesn't say we are descended from apes, just that we are apes, like we are mammals, chordates, and animals. Mrs. O insisted in my talk with her that we are not apes, we are humans, not grasping that all humans are apes, but not all apes are humans. Fine, I knew I wasn't going to change her mind (especially since I somehow, unforgivably broke down and started crying over this whole thing myself), and I felt bad enough about coming in and questioning her about this little incident since she has always shown herself to be such a thoughtful, sincere, effective teacher. And I know that kindergarten is not really the place to debate creationism vs. evolution.

Or maybe it is. I mean, not a debate, but allowing an open, respectful environment for discussion of different beliefs. Shouldn't we be teaching our kids how to listen to and respect different viewpoints from early on?

Yah, in a perfect world where the teachers have the time to do that, and the willingness, and the support of the parents as well. Which means that, no, kindergarten or high school for that matter is not the place for such things. Sigh.

So, here she is, after listening to and believing her parents for most of her life about what she is, her teacher is telling her something different. And the kids are laughing at her for believing her parents.

I know that I will have to talk to her in the next few nights about how, yes, we are apes, yet Mrs. O doesn't know everything about taxonomy, and that I'm proud of her for sticking to her guns regardless of the kids laughing at her and the teacher disagreeing with her. I'll have to discuss how the topic of humans as animals and apes will lead into the very sensitive subject of evolution for many kids in her class, since they are taught that humans were created, and this somehow conflicts with them being apes. I don't really understand it, I can't get my mind around why that's a conflict, but it is and we have to be aware of that.

Which leads into why Mrs. O let the class laugh at her and agreed with them. She can't and won't get into an evolution/creation discussion (if I came in because she said humans aren't apes, imagine the parents she'll have storming in about her saying we are apes..... I guess, even though I still insist it isn't a true evolution topic. Yet, I did come in with the idea that her insistence we aren't apes stemmed from some force keeping her from even remotely dismissing creationism..... is it all in my head, or not? I mean, Natassia has been pounded by religious fundamentalist (mostly Christian and LDS) classmates this whole school year, I am already sensitive to her - or perhaps in reality my - beliefs getting trounced. No, it's not just in my head, because Mrs. O did say she wants to avoid parents on the other end of the faith spectrum getting angry over this.)

So, this all winds down to questioning authority. Should she believe the teacher, or her parents? Should she toss both aside and find her own truths, as it were? When is it appropriate to say to a teacher, or a parent, "No, you're wrong." (and, do I put a question mark in there, or keep it as a period?) When should she simply dismiss her teacher/parent and not cause a disruption, and when should she insist that her views be taken seriously and be given due consideration and respect? Should she have just sat there and let the kids laugh at her, or should she have insisted that she is right and keep insisting until the teacher stops the laughter and tells the class that Natassia is entitled to her beliefs and respect for those beliefs?

I hate it when I have to bite my tongue and let my peers or superiors say and or do something I completely disagree with. Sometimes I'm ashamed that I did nothing. I struggle with this issue myself all the time... how do I help guide my kids through it as well?